When I left the hospital with Grady, no one handed me a glass ball to rub my hands over, or a magic eight ball to ask important questions to or a business card to the local Fortune Teller. No, we left the hospital with a little baby boy, who deserves to just be a baby, free from inspection, expectation, pressure, examination and generalization. Free from open-ended questions.
So when I get the “is he high functioning” or “what level is he at”… I kind of cringe. What does it matter? and if I told you “low” (or whatever that is) what would that accomplish. He is just the way God made him, each thread of his being has purpose. Sometimes, I think people like to hear that he is “high functioning”, as it takes away from the surprise blow that he has down syndrome. It makes it “ok”. It numbs the awkwardness I see in their faces. Somedays, I tell people what they want to hear because it’s easier that way.
1 Samuel 16:7 “For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”
Hang in there with me for a moment, follow me…
Grady has down syndrome, he in some way shape or form will show delay, he already has. He may not talk till a little later and when he does he might talk “different”. Grady may not walk until a little later than his peers, but he will get there.
Today, Grady is 9 months, we are not fortune tellers, and their is no way to tell where he will fall as far as functionality. Just like I don’t know if Mason will cure cancer or become a dad at 16. Just like, I don’t know If I will die at 28 or 88, only time will tell.
Today, Grady is still my baby, and when the day comes when we realize if he is “high” or “low” functioning, you bet your bottom I will love on that child no differently. We will encourage him, love on him, expose him to new things, and fill in the cracks that society leaves with endless love.
do you follow me? can we be ok with either way… because we trust in HIM with HIS work. Grady is not mine in the big picture, he is God’s… so I will be thankful for another day to just be his mom. I function just fine that way.