I have so many thoughts running through my mind, so many blog posts I want to write… inspiration is all around me these days. But to update you all on how my little man is: 35 weeks and Grady weighed in over 6 lbs (this is a big baby)…. and continues to maintain a clean health report from the Ultrasound Scans. My worry of Duodenal Atresia (narrowing of the intestines) was one of the main issues they were looking for and couldn’t find anything. His Femur bones started to fall behind schedule by more than a week’s margin as they have been in the past. Grady’s little legs where measuring 2.5 week behind schedule compared to the rest of his body. This is expected with a diagnosis of DS…but I can’t wait to see what he can do with those little legs. He amazes me already.
Last Sunday I was feeling some pretty heavy contractions all morning (braxton hicks) but they came with unusual pressure. I thought something might be up since my Chronic Heart Burn has recently disappeared as well. Go figure and come to find out, he has dropped and the doctor said that my cervix is paper thin and ready to start dilating. (oh the joys of pregnancy talk) So pretty much, the waiting game has started. I am not opposed to a Valentines Baby so I am pondering jumping rope and long walks on the 13th. I have recently made the big decision to V-back it with Grady. My doctor highly reccomends it and well, with much prayer and spousal support, I am doing it. <insert prayer request: Dear Lord, Please do not allow Snow or Traffic Delay on the Tappan Zee Bridge, Oh and I know large Polish Skulls are impressive, but spare me the pain this time around, thank you, Amen. >
okie, time to vent: I am going to start calling these experiences another “notch” on my wisdom belt. I am calling it my wisdom belt, because the more I learn about DS, the more I love on Grady, and the closer I get with God, the wiser I become on how to react within my heart. So pretty much, when someone says something absolutely absurd, I don’t allow myself to boil over with fury. During my ultrasound this week I had an interesting experience with the Tech. She was new to me, and well was probably one of the most nosiest people I have yet to come across. When you lay on an Ultrasound Table your belly exposed and Nerves run steadily high as you study the screen the last thing you want to do is be bombarded with intrusive questions. I must say I am getting pretty darn good at looking at Grady on the screen though. Anyways, the tech starts off with stating the first obvious statement “So your baby has Trisonomy 21″ I say, “Uh-huh” (I think to myself, didn’t you read my file?) She says: “So how did you feel after you found out your baby was going to have Down Syndrome? I say: “Fine, we were prepared, It was part of God’s Plan” (I think, ok so asking feelings questions during an ultrasound with a complete stranger is not in your protocol ms. Tech, can we please keep to the script here, you aren’t my therapist, oh and I don’t think you could handle it if I told you something absolutely absurd regarding my feelings towards my almost born son) Then my favorite ultrasound tech of the year asks “Does anyone in your family have Down Syndrome” I say, “Nope” ( I think, umm, ok so when did you shift from being my ultrasound tech to my Genetic Counselor, and wonder if I told her my brother has it or my sister or something along those sorts… what is that question going to accomplish at this point in time) Okay so last one ” So are you going to have those people come out to your house after he is born… LONG PAUSE… the… stutter…. interventionists, do you have that all set up?” I say ” well you can’t set that up until after he is born, that is protocol for NYS” (I think, ok that one isn’t that bad, but clearly you have really made it clear to me that you really don’t know what you are talking about and since we are spending this time together, a very vulnerable time for me, perhaps we can just skip the awkward nosey, silence filling questions and accept the fact that you don’t really know much about DS, and obviously have no clue about etiquette when it comes to dealing with extra chromosomes and such, so let’s talk about the weather next time? ok? good.)
All of this might sound silly to some, but when I am laying there staring at my new born son’s body, praying that everything is ok, the last thing I need is someone asking me questions that I am not comfortable answering. That is when me being “peppy and friendly” bites me in the butt. So, I’ll put a Notch on my belt, because It really didn’t anger me, but I do feel the need to somehow (with Grace) express to someone of importance the incredibly awkward situation it was for me. Not sure about how that will happen yet, but I am praying about it. Ok, I am done venting tonight. Thank you for letting me vent….